#292 – Bad Haircuts

Every time I get a haircut, it looks terrible for about six weeks. Then it looks good for, like, a day, and that’s how I know it’s time for a new haircut. It’s what I call the “Haircut Cycle of Shame.” – Cory Matthews, Boy Meets World

Haircuts are tricky. You can either leave the hair salon with $75 less in your pocket and with absolutely no noticeable difference, or you can come out looking like a brand-new person with a brand-new hairstylist to hate. Either way, the results aren’t good. No matter which salon you go to, the process is always the same. Whoever is cutting your hair starts first by vehemently insulting whoever has done your hair before him (see: rule #1 in Rules for Becoming a Hairstylist). Then your stylist asks you what you want done to your hair (just to amuse himself) before he proceeds onto doing whatever he had in mind from the start. And so you put your trust into a French man whose pants are tighter than yours, and the snipping begins. A little from here, a lot from there, and 20 minutes later… Voilà! You have yourself a terrible haircut. Merci for nothing, Gaston. See you in 6 weeks.

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